Martha, Mary, and the Better Part

It’s easy to overlook Martha’s virtuous qualities in this Sunday’s Gospel: her honesty, frankness, diligence, thoughtfulness, caring nature, and hospitality. She is portrayed as an anxious woman worried about many things, but in reality, she may simply be concerned about ensuring that Jesus, their guest, is well cared for—making sure he is well-fed and rested. Moreover, it’s easy to judge her solely based on this one incident. Remember that Martha was the one who strongly professed that her brother, Lazarus, would rise again when Jesus questioned her about her faith. “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” Jesus asked her. “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.”

We need Martha’s strong faith in times of affliction and frustration. We need her strength, indefatigable faith, and hope to console and inspire us. After all, she was a woman who cared deeply, who meant what she said, and who put her faith into action.

Surely, she was not perfect, as depicted in this Sunday’s Gospel. She had her fears, worries, and insecurities. But that’s what makes her relatable to us: her humanity and vulnerability. She was honest about her feelings; she recognized and owned them; she was real.

Her sister, Mary, of course, had chosen the “better part,” as Jesus told her in the Gospel. She did not argue with Jesus about it; instead, she quietly acknowledged her behavior and resumed her work. Perhaps, she became aware of her attitude and planned to sit at Jesus’s feet as well.

This interplay of personalities exists in every family. There are times when we project our frustrations, worries, insecurities, resentments, anger, and jealousy onto our parents and siblings. That’s simply part of being human. The most important thing is that we recognize these feelings and are willing to address them maturely. Those of us who recognize these behaviors and attitudes in our family members must strive to be understanding. One way to exercise this virtue is to remind ourselves, “Everyone is doing the best they can; everyone is dealing with some issue in their life. No one is perfect.”

However, this does not mean we shouldn’t create space for dialogue with one another about what affects us. In families, it’s crucial to be honest and open with each other while maintaining mutual respect. Sometimes, we need to adopt Mary’s approach from today’s Gospel, choosing the “better part” by humbly setting aside our tasks for a moment and simply listening to one another.

Warm blessings to all!

Your loving pastor,