Letting the tides of forgiveness wash away old pains during the first year of married life was the most reliable approach in all the marriage encounters we’ve listened to.
So, we basically reintroduced ourselves, shook hands and began again.
But the only hits in starting over within the relationship was this: what do we do with the junk, heap of mistakes we’ve made over the years, with all the grudges that accumulated? How tempting it is to just walk away from it all and fall into the arms of someone new. Who has no idea I look like an underground animal in the mornings…But eventually, I know I’d discover a “new and improved husband” who would have a few obnoxious surprises for met too. I don’t know what form it would take but from my knowledge of humans, it was going to be “something” and the junk would eventually phase out and sweep out like periodically sweeping the old junk off the porch slowly and starting anew — a great definition of forgiveness.
But that is easier said than done because there were some things I had done and said that cut so deep, that was so unfair and hurtful, at the time, he would never get over it then.
Spiritual guidance helped me understand that holding a grudge hurts no one but myself.
Letting go of anger and applying forgiveness is rarely accomplished overnight. Forgiveness, for me, was a gradual process.
The debris of antique hurt describes some of the feeling ones experience during the letting go process.
It is like dipping back into the sea for the metaphor that paints the portrait of love’s inner workings.
For ages, poets and writers refer to the ocean, to describe the magical strong, unpredictable, cleansing, soothing healing qualities of love.
Letting go is letting go without grasping old grievances again of what we’ve said, and eventually did.
As my husband and I rode out the new tides of love to hold a marriage together. It felt and began to view, through more understanding eyes of compassion that my close friends’ marriages had floundered.
A hot blush at blunder is the birth pain of perception…the hate, the galling realization, the unlived pride, bring sharp pain, even as it teaches us the drama and hope of life’s chaos, as nothing else can.
In forgiving, you melt and become tender, the imagination stretches into its widest, every wince of
Self-knowledge is accepted. With ease and restoration, they stir your humility. These are your most enabling moments. It is at this time we outgrow ourselves as you enter your right world.
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E-mail Mylah at [email protected].
