Hello kababayans. It’s that time again when we resolve to change some of our habits for good. We’re naturally feeling optimistic with the arrival of a new year, a cosmic reset – a time for new beginnings. So we sign up for gym memberships, fill our pantry and fridge with sugar-free, fat-free, flavor-free foods, and declare to quit other vices cold turkey. But how do we stick with these resolutions throughout the year? Many have given up on keeping resolutions entirely and I don’t blame them. For a lot of us, once the newness of 2016 wears off, our commitment to changes we said we would make just vanishes. And then we feel guilty and end up punishing ourselves by going back to old habits. And so the cycle goes.
Well, let me share with you my secrets on how you can make 2016 your best yet without feeling defeated so you can finally move closer to making those lifestyle changes for good.
1. First, let’s talk about mindset using simple astronomy. While the New Year has been celebrated for thousands of years as the beginning of a new revolution around the sun, or new calendar year, this detail alone ignores other variations in the cosmos. After a visit to the local planetarium, I learned that while planets revolve around the sun consistently, “how” they do so is inconsistent. The planets tilt differently, the stars relocate, and in general, there are unnoticeable changes in the Universe everyday. This got me thinking about how we see ourselves in the context of change and growth. If the entire Universe in its very nature is changing each day, why are we keeping resolutions that are often inflexible, restrictive, and designed for failure? This means that if my original resolution is “Work out 5 days a week” and I learn that my body simply can’t tolerate that much activity because my baseline is “Sit on the couch and watch tv,” why isn’t it ok to change this to “Walk for 30 minutes 2-3 days a week”? Accept that change is part of the plan.
2. Next, remember that Every Day is a Brand New Day, an attitude that helps us make better decisions without the residual guilt. Get excited about each new day, which gives you the opportunity to start over. You don’t need to let the mistakes of yesterday be the same mistakes today. In other words, this is your chance to forgive yourself. Likewise, do not rest on your laurels of yesterday either. If you were successful at avoiding junk food yesterday, guess what? Today is a completely different day and your body needs healthy, high quality fuel for today’s activities! Everyday is a new beginning.
3. By far, this is the biggest game-changer for myself and for many of my clients: Crowd out the Bad with the Good.
a. More Kindness to Self, Less Self-Criticism.
Are you even aware of all the negative self-talk you tell yourself throughout the day? Many of us have to work on quieting the inner critic. And this critic can really do a number on your confidence to tackle new challenges. So, take some time now to think about 5 things you appreciate about yourself. Write these down and keep this list somewhere you can see everyday. Remind yourself of your great qualities and show yourself the same kindness you would give to your best friend.
b. More Gulay, Less Tinapay.
When I lead people through clean eating programs, I always advise them to give allowances for unhealthy foods. What if for every slice of pizza, you have 2 plates of salad? Not only will you feel better about doing so, your body will also have an easier time eliminating all that processed starch. Think of other less healthy habits this way. More walking, less sitting. More water, less soda. More in-person meet ups, less texting.
4. Next, think “I Am” instead of “I will be.”
This is also called “Fake it ‘til you make it.” When you tell yourself that who you aspire to be is who you are now, you will notice that habits aligned with that identity come with ease. A long time ago, I signed up for my first half-marathon thinking “I am a runner.” Of course I had been training, but given it was my first long distance race, I did not feel 100% confident. What if I told myself “I will be a runner after I complete the half marathon?” It probably would have been a struggle to complete that race repeating in my head “I am NOT a runner.”
Remember that the journey is about progress, not perfection. It’s about the lessons. So rather than just making a list of resolutions, ask yourself in what ways would you like to grow? What experiences, activities, habits would help you evolve so you may continue to live out your potential? Because just like the stars, where you are today will not be the same as where you will be next year. You will be even brighter!
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Anna Marie Cruz is a Los Angeles-based Health Coach who works with busy professionals and entrepreneurs reach an ideal weight, eat clean, and craft a value-based lifestyle they love.