THERE’S this joke about a little boy anxious to see his expectant mother give birth. She explains that it will take several months for the baby to come out. The boy then recalls how his engineer father had told his workers on a rush project to “put more men on the job,” to hasten its completion.
“Mom,” says the boy. “Why don’t you put more men on the job?”
If you think that’s funny, guess what the administration of Benigno S. Aquino III has been doing the past five-going-on-six years. The classic example is the Department of Agriculture, notorious for incompetence and accused of corruption. Instead of replacing the Secretary of Agriculture, Proceso Alcala, Aquino appointed former Senator Kiko Pangilinan as “Agricultural Czar” or some title to that effect. Aquino put more men on the job.
Now comes this congressman from Quezon City, Winston Castillo (eager to have his 15 seconds of fame), suggesting that the solution to Metro Manila’s traffic woes would be for Malacañang to appoint a “traffic czar.”
That’s a traffic czar placed on top of a traffic czar (the MMDA chairman) on top of several traffic czars (the Metro Manila mayors). And THAT is supposed to solve the infernal traffic problem? Good grief!
The management geniuses who populate the Makati Business Club and who recently rated the various government offices, ostensibly based on perceived efficiency, should tell the idiots running the government that overlayering is a formula for confusion and hand-washing.
In other words, the more cooks working on the broth, the more difficult it is to pinpoint who spoiled it.
This reminds me of the tragedy-on-top-of-a-tragedy that destroyed my hometown of Tacloban. The original tragedy was super typhoon Yolanda. The tragedy on top of it was the presence of three Keystone Kops, Mar Roxas of DILG, Dinky Soliman of Social Welfare and Voltaire Gazmin of Defense.
In a press conference with Roxas presiding (which I wrote about in this column), the following dialogue was recorded by Rappler:
“RAPPLER: Sino po ba ang ground commander natin sa relief operations na ito? (Who is the ground commander in this relief operation?)
“ROXAS: There is no such title dahil ayon sa NDRRMC, it’s Sec Voltz Gazmin ang aming chairman, at ina-assign-assign niya kami sa kung ano ang aming dapat gawin. (There is no such title because according to the NDRRMC, it’s Sec Voltz Gazmin who is our chairman, and he assigns us to do whatever we have to do. )
“RAPPLER: Pero sir, who is calling the shots here in this center? (But sir, who is calling the shots here in this center?)
“ROXAS: Wala. You can see the process that is being undertaken, and it is a consultative process. (No one. You can see the process that is being undertaken, and it is a consultative process.)
“SOLIMAN: Lahat kami, buong pamahalaan, pambansa at lokal, kumikilos as one. But more than that, ‘yun ang gusto kong ipaalam sa lahat – it’s also whole of society. Lahat ng private sector, lahat ng volunteers, lahat ng volunteers dito sa Tacloban, nagre-repack sila. This is whole of society, responding to a crisis. Nagkaisa ang bansa; ‘yun ang ating mensahe. (Everyone of us, the whole of government, national and local, move as one. But more than this, what I want everyone to know – it’s also whole of society. The entire private sector, all volunteers, all volunteers here in Tacloban are repacking. This is whole of society, responding to a crisis. The nation is working as one; that’s our message.)’
But Roxas, Soliman and Gazmin were not done yet. Soliman then explained an “operations management concept” which she called, “the Convergent Approach.”
Here’s what I wrote in reaction to that: “I did a double-take and struggled to find an analogy for ‘Convergent Approach.’ In football, that means operating without a quarterback. In a symphony orchestra, without a conductor. In the corporate environment, without a CEO. In the military, without a commanding officer.
“Apparently, in the Roxas-Soliman Institute of Advanced Operations Management, as applied to the Yolanda crisis, the Convergent Approach is one where every player is left to his or her own best intentions, based on respective levels of competence or incompetence.”
In an earlier meeting between Roxas and Tacloban Mayor Alfred Romualdez, Roxas had required the latter to submit a formal request for disaster assistance from the national government, otherwise, “Bahala kayo sa buhay niyo.”
Roxas, who is supposed to have studied management in an elite university in America, has since become famous for classic responses to the problems of the country. The latest is his rationale for the infernal traffic problems: It’s supposed to be a result of the “booming” economy. No solution. Just a rationalization. He might as well have said, “Bahala kayo sa buhay niyo.”
Come to think of it, that is what the occupant in Malacañang practically told the suffering folks of Metro Manila, if we are to assume that the palace spokespersons are articulating the thoughts of the president of the country.
According to one Manila daily, Deputy spokesperson Abigail Valte has asked the public “to be patient” in the face of the metropolis’ “traffic woes.”
The news report was about how “vehicles clogged and barely crawled along Andrews Avenue, Airport Road and Sucat Road – vital arteries leading to the Ninoy Aquino International Airport’s terminals 1,2,3 and 4.”
The news item further stated: “Valte said they received a report that a big number of people failed to make it to their flights because of the ongoing construction works in the Villamor Air Base area. She said airport authorities had been advising the public to consider the heavy traffic because of construction projects when planning their trips.”
Well, what choice do the poor motorists, air travelers and commuters have except to “plan their trips”? The reason, of course, is because the idiots behind the massive construction projects did not do their mandatory part of the planning.
Let me cite two examples of competent planning and concern for the convenience of the commuting public (as opposed to the palpak and manhid approach of this administration): the massive expansion of the San Francisco International Airport and the replacement of the eastern span of the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge.
To ensure that commuters and air travelers would not be inconvenienced, the plans and budgets for both projects included alternative routes that commuters could take, while the main thoroughfares were under construction.
This meant a temporary bridge from Treasure Island to the Oakland side while the original bridge (part of which had collapsed during the 1988 Loma Prieta earthquake) was being demolished and a new span was being built.
In the case of the expansion of the San Francisco International Airport, air travelers hardly felt any inconvenience because of the alternative arteries prepared prior to the main construction activity.
Compare that with what’s happening in Metro Manila, something that I am painfully aware of because I live just off Sucat in Parañaque. I will give my comments in Tagalog so that our non-Filipino readers will not understand me:
“Pinagsabay-sabay ang tinamaan ng lintik na construction at bahala na tayong mga taong bayan sa buhay natin. Diyos ko. Bakit ba tayo pinarurusahan ng mga bobo?”
And now, back to English: Dear management geniuses of the Makati Business Club. Is this the kind of governance you want to sustain for another six years? (gregmacabenta@hotmail.com)
