This year which will soon bid us farewell has given me great lessons and priceless experiences both physically, emotionally and spiritually at this time of my life. It is filled with many occurrences , either imagined or planned, as well as events beyond one’s control, like death. Before thanksgiving my only living sister, Sor. Leticia Delfin, OP, (a Dominican nun for almost 50 years) passed away after a lingering deadly Parkinson’s disease! As a practicing Catholic, I have accepted the inevitability of death, as part of parcel of living on earth. No one can escape death, the greatest equalizer in life, which even the richest or most powerful person cannot negotiate and win.
I believe I have undergone a profound intrinsic metamorphosis in my life, as I traverse my unique personal journey on this planet. As I do my regular walk of faith, I experience a wide gamut of human emotions along the way that often compels me to ponder and reflect deeply the purpose of my life With the expected passing away of my last living Sister Leticia ( I had 3 other sisters who have passed much earlier) before thanksgiving and buried on her 70th birthday last month, it hit me like a brick that any day it will also be my last day, considering that I am their eldest brother among my siblings.
On Thanksgiving Day and now the Season of Advent, I am quite aware and have made another resolution that indeed, I have to live the VERY best I can DAILY because one of these days, it really will be my last day too! Every waking hour, as I hike on this Earth, creating and adding substantial or meaningful “contents” placed inside that little inconspicuous hyphen that will separate the year of my birth and the year of death on my tombstone. What a sobering thought causing a very powerful earthquake in my bones shaking my whole being! Spiritually, I think I am ready to die, but as a human being, I am also scared to undergo that certain phase my life that I have never experienced before!
As my desire for material possessions has significant declined during the last couple of decades, my craving for inner peace and spiritual health has increased, following the example of my favorite Saint John the Baptist who unflinchingly declared that “HE must increase and I must decrease.” That bold statement that bewildered many of his followers must be shouted louder and with more frequency these days when most of pubic servants and civil or political leaders appear too callous and arrogant to recognize and work towards the common good! Many have become S. S. (self serving) leaders instead of true Servant Leaders like the likes of Mahatma Gandhi or George Washington. Sad documentary of our times, but quite true as we are bombarded by depressing TV news and the daily newspapers. There seems to be a dearth of good news, often hidden behind BAD news caused by evil men upon his fellowmen. News from Ukraine to Israel, from the U.S. malls where emboldened daylight robberies occur, from school campuses to places of worship where random shootings take place, are now too common. Devil appears anywhere working hard to win and destroy our peace on earth. It seems that there is no more public place that is sacred and immune from violence and crimes.
To be happy and at peace is getting harder and becoming very challenging. I am glad that I am now “retired” from the rat race in pursuit of material things that sometimes causes other bad things, like stress, depressions or ulcers. By no means, I am not a rich man, but I think I have a rich life. As an active volunteer of our Peace & Justice Ministry of our church and a prison Minister in our Diocese of Orange, I have learned much despite that I have now lesser cash or income the last couple of decades during my retirement. Ironically, however, there are upsides as I feel much happier and more fulfilled now that when I worked 50-60 hours a week chasing the Almighty Dollar. I now live a much simpler life and happier with more joy doing by doing “nothing” but just reading and writing (I have published by first book, “Finding Life’s Meaning & Leaving a Legacy” that was diligently done during the COVID-19 years) For physical activities, I still bike and also do and enjoy my organic gardening and doing my “APOStolic” by being an uber driver to my two young granddaughters from school. If you are do what I do, you will know the JOY these activities can bring you as priceless rewards.
The biblical saying that “that where your treasures are, is where your heart will be” is indeed true. With that backdrop, please allow me to end my last 2023 column by sharing some random activities that you too can do that may contribute to your own life’s happiness, fulfillment and joy, while helping our world to become a better place and a more peaceful society for our children, their children and their children:
- Minimize or moderate your greed for more material things. Most likely you too have more than enough to last you until you die. There is a study that after a certain amount of money you in your bank account, any more addition can no longer significantly augment towards your happiness and comfort.
- We all have two hands. Use one hand to help yourself, and the other hand, to help others.
- Like Mother Teresa has shown the world, we have to do our activities, not only with our H ead and H ands but also engage our Heart (to love others) This is the her Three H’s to be Happy and JOY-FULL
- Volunteer to any ministry in your church or any community benefits organizations (CBOs) in your city doing good works for those who have less in life, the young and old and vulnerable. Work for the common good, especially at risk children, the poor , the weak and those in need. Many non-profit organizations like the Rotary, Kiwanis, Lions , YMCA, RobynesNest, and many others that can use your time,. skills and experience.
- Tutor young children to read, teach them to become productive citizens while their minds are moldable. Idle children often times lead to destructive behaviors, and often the big factors why young people land in jails.
- Rather than cursing the darkness around you, light your own candle. Or become like the water lily plant that is over polluted waters but still thrives and cleanses the dirty water beneath it.
- For Christians, there are many corporal acts of mercy that you can do. Matthew 35 writes: feeding the hungry, giving drink to the thirsty, clothing the naked or visiting those in prison are important corporal
- Meet a new friend, by being a friend to someone.
- Live simply, so others can simply live. SHARE MORE!
Many of us can easily do any of the above without much cost or hundreds of hours investment if you really wanted to. Time and talent even without much treasure can help significantly to better this world we all share. Thank you for reading this Christmas/NY column.
Perchance, if you want more information what to do or how to volunteer, and make your boring life more exciting, and worth living, feel free to call me and I can share my factual experiences in volunteer work with anyone who calls me. You may also visit any of these websites: Prison ministry (www.rcbo.com/restore) or Rotary (www.rotary5320.org) or the CBO for at risk kids at: (www.robynesnets.org)
Or simply contact me at 714 746 3088 or send an email to: [email protected].
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL! May the coming year bring you prosperity, happiness and PEACE!
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Please note that this article is not legal advice and is not intended as legal advice. The article is intended to provide only general, non-specific legal information. This article is not intended to cover all the issues related to the topic discussed. The specific facts that apply to your matter may make the outcome different than would be anticipated by you. This article does create any attorney client relationship between you and the Law Offices of Kenneth U. Reyes, APLC. This article is not a solicitation.
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